Quotes submitted by "Levi"

#16   there's no place like home

-12 [+ / -]     Nov 23, 2008

  • Employee Guy 1: (makes loud groaning noise) That's Chewbacca.
  • Employee Guy 2: Ain't that that guy from Wizard of Oz? You sound just like 'im!

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#5   what happens when the change is $4.20?

12 [+ / -]     Nov 19, 2008

  • Redneck Clerk: $17.92 is your total. In 1792, Columbus sailed the ocean blue!

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#17   thanks, now i'm gonna be analyzing this all night

-14 [+ / -]     Oct 05, 2008

  • Redneck Clerk 1: Y'know, I've always wondered that myself about them three little bears.
  • Redneck Clerk 2: Whaddya mean?
  • Redneck Clerk 1: Well, if the momma's porridge was too cold, and the daddy's porridge was too hot, how come the baby's was just right?
  • Redneck Clerk 2: Wow, I never thoughta that.

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#4   "she" just loves keeping up with traffic news

14 [+ / -]     Oct 04, 2008

  • Large Bus Driver: 22 checkin' in.
  • Radio: Aight 22. Y'all might want to watch out for that traffic on Magnolia today. It's hard to get through.
  • Large Bus Driver: That's what she said.
  • (Passengers and Radio are silent)
  • Radio: (after some time) Copy that.

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#1   our first poem is an ode to monosaccharides

50 [+ / -]     Sep 16, 2008

  • Professor: Alright class, welcome to English Composition 1. Please read along with me as I cover the syllabus.
  • Dumpy Kid: (opens door) Is this English Comp 1?
  • Professor: No, this is graduate-level Biochemistry.
  • Dumpy Kid: Sorry... (leaves awkwardly)
  • Professor: Week one, we will be reading several essays and poems...

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#14   it doesn't count just because your jeep is green

-9 [+ / -]     Sep 14, 2008

  • Hipster: One pack of American Spirits, please.
  • Clerk: I've only sold a few packs of these... what's the deal?
  • Hipster: Well, they're made from all natural ingredients. Plus, I'm trying to "Go Green."
  • Clerk: Oh, okay.
  • (Hipster drives off in large Jeep)

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